It was Oct 13, 1998 Tuesday mid-morning when my elder brother n younger sister showed up at my office to break the news that our dad had passed away. My dad was away in India to seek treatment for the gangrene which spread through his whole body.
It all started with a small cut on his right toe which my dad had refused to seek treatment then but took us on a trip to the Brooklyn, U.S. to attend my eldest second cousin's wedding. My dad was in pain but he didn't let it keep him down. After the trip, my dad had to be admitted to T.T.S.H, where the doctors told my dad that the gangrene had spread to his knee and in order to save him, they had to chop of his leg. of course, my dad was scared cause here's someone who had travelled Europe on his own and he didn't want this is to be an obstacle. So my dad told the doctors that he wanted to have a second opinion and off to India he went.
So he went with my uncle (i think) to Chennai (Madras), India, to seek a second opinion. Unfortunately, the doctors told my dad that there is no cure and the gangrene was spreading and the leg had to go. One of the doctors who happened to be related to us told my dad the same thing so my dad made up his mind and told the doctors that he would do the surgery in Singapore.
However, a guy showed up at the hospital and told my dad that there is a cure (not sure how he knew of my dad's illness in the first place, maybe they had conversed). He told my dad that he can treat my dad using herbs instead of western medications but he can't do his practise in the hospital. So my dad seeing a glimpse of light took the chance and flew to Trivandrum, Kerala, India (my dad's hometown) and seek treatment whilst residing at my grandfather's place.
The medicine man told my dad to forgo all western medications and just rely on herbs and whatever he provided. In return, my dad kept paying this guy for his services (not really sure of the amount but it was quite a bit). On the outside, the leg seemed to be recovering and everyone thought the medication was working. However, after a month of so, my dad's health got worse and my mom flew over to my grandfather's place to be with my dad.
Then on Oct 13 Tuesday morning, my dad's condition really got worse and my relatives brought my dad to the hospital where the doctors were furious with them for allowing this to happened. The medicine man had no intentions of curing my dad, he was just in for money and didn't show up for a few days after my dad's health got worse, he was nowhere to be found too. The doctors tried their best but they couldn't save my dad.
Back in Singapore, my bro made arrangements for us to fly to India by India Airlines the next day. The airport staff had upgraded us to first class (at no cost) after learning of our grievance, we only realised it when we were about to be board... a big thank you to them. So off to India we went to bury my dad.
My brothers went to the hospital to make arrangements for the body to be brought to my grandfather's place where we held the wake. It was really lonely being far away from home and not having familiar faces around you during that time. Everyone there was telling us how close they were with my dad and all the jazz. It's like someone after some throne of something or money.
Anyways, not really sure when my died was laid to rest but i do know that he was laid beside his brother and parents. (My father's bro is my second eldest second cousin grandfather). I remember being at the cemetery where i was pushed back by strangers who wanted to pay their last respect to my dad as the coffin was laid down. It was like as if we were the visiting team and we were being pushed over by the home fans.
Prayers were offered at my grandfather's place and the nearby church (Christ The King) with food provided. It made me feel that most people were just there for the free food. It was kind of difficult time as we were strangers in a foreign land. The only people that I knew were my relatives which is only handful. So I was really lonely.
Oh yes, my grandfather's place is like a landed property kind thing with a lawn, two storey house and a balcony; but for some strange reasons, my grandfather, my aunt and cousins sleeps on the first level. So we took the upper room as we just need to crash for the night. The balcony had a door which would be locked most of the time. One night whilst we were all asleep we heard banging coming from the balcony's door as if someone was trying to break in. I was the first one up and off I went to investigate. I opened the room door and looked around with a torch. The balcony's door was locked and there was no one on the balcony. My brothers joined me and we went down to check on my aunt and cousins, they were all okay. The thieves or whatever was not where to be found. My eldest sis told me that I was a bit rash opening the door straight away not knowing what could be behind the door. I realised that I could have endangered my family but then again, good thing the balcony's door was locked cause our room door wasn't!! Otherwise God know what would have happened.
Soon the wake was over and my grandfather sat on his favorite chair at the lawn on a Tues morning of Oct 20, 1998. I was in the hall looking out at my grandfather on his favorite chair on the lawn while the workers were clearing the tent. I had the vision of the final scene of 'Godfather Part 3' where Al Pacino who played 'Don Michael Corleone' sat on his favorite chair in the lawn and just passed on.
Godfather Part III- ending..
'The scene dissolves to a short montage of Michael's memories, the first being a dance with Mary, the second being a dance with his first wife, Apollonia, and the last being a dance with Kay. The film ends in an unspecified year, showing an aged and broken Michael, seated in the front yard of his Sicilian villa. He slowly puts on a pair of sunglasses, drops an orange from his hand, slumps out of his chair, collapses to the ground, and slowly dies, completely alone. A small dog sniffs around his body and the screen fades to black as Mascagni's "Intermezzo" resolves to a high F major chord'
Its was 3pm on the same day, whilst were at my uncle's place (my mother's brother), we received a call that my grandfather had passed away. Well, he didn't die alone but I guess he had live his full life and he was happy to see his grandchildren for the last time. He collapse in the bathroom just after having his lunch. The workers who had came earlier to clear the tent and had to come back in the evening to put it back again ( I still find that funny not sure why.. haha). In the meantime, they placed the body in the hall. My uncle had made arrangements for us to live at my uncle's place as it would be inconvenient leaving in the morning from,y grandfather's place; and we didn't want to stay for another 7 days. So we left India on Oct 21, 1998 and we heard that they had placed my grandfather beside my grandmother who passed away a long time back when I was still in secondary school.
Anyways, fast forward to present day, my mother was admitted on 8 Oct, as her sugar level had shot up. It was supposed to be an overnight observation but her sugar level increased so they had to keep her for another week. The two following days, the blood pressure shot up from 170+ to 180+, not sure why; but it was back to normal yesterday with a reading of 120+. The doctors told us that my mom's need therapy as she is finding if difficult to walk on her own and suggested to send her to Ang Mo Kio Community Hospital for two weeks. My elder bro and eldest sister will make the decision if we want to send my mom there but then again, leaving my mom at home is not an option too as she would be alone.
I really hope my mom gets better. Promised to look after her and cherish her even more.. I broke down at the chalet on Sat night and I thank you Rick for being there... well, let's see how things go.
In the meantime, do keep my mom in your prayers, thanks.
